Today was a much appreciated day off. Don’t worry, I booked it. Good for us all: the company because they didn’t have to deal with my insescent complaining, me because I’m getting paid to sit on my arse all day.
And this is where I realise, whilst watching Daytime TV with my dad, that all the programs fall into two categories.
“Antiques” and “House Prices”.
That’s all, between the hours of 9 and 5. Oh no, whilst normal people are at work, the schedule has a very limited market: old people and students (and presumably Antique Dealers and Estate Agents too). So it gives them what they want.
Don’t believe me? Here’s it between 11 and 1, on BBC One.
I can assure you in the above statement: “booty” means “treasure”, not “bums”. I was so dissappointed.
There we go, a whole morning of licence fee money, wasted. Wouldn’t mind if they varied it a bit, but after the news and neighbours, it was another half hour of “Cash in the Attic”, before the kiddies program started.
If this is what I’ve got to look forward to when I retire, then I’m shooting myself at 65. I wonder if TV would change by the time I hit 65? Would daytime TV contain Pimp My Zimmer and World’s most amazing Death Defying stunts 284, or eBay Bargain Hunt*?
If the latter is the case, I’m retiring to spend my days playing golf. After all, it was almost Tit Monday today.
In other news: The biggest amount of traffic I get to this blog from google is from people searching for Rhys and Sarah, two characters from shite soap Hollyoaks. They’re kind of seeing each other at the moment. Of course, anybody who reads this blog will know why they are finding this: some are innocent searches, some are not so innocent. Nevertheless, I watched it today, and, when Sarah’s mum started hitting on poor Rhys, it confirmed one thing.
Every single character called Rhys on telly is an arsehole.
* Actually, that’s not a bad idea.