The Gospel According To Rhys - Colwyn Bay North Wales Web blog About Sport, Wrestling, PHP, SEO, Social Media & Networking

Recently, to prepare for my interepid trip down to the mightly London (LONDONIANS – Fancy a blog meet? Email me at the usual address with the subject “Meet me in London!”, and I’ll see what I can do), I have been listening to London’s finest station: XFM. Despite them being utter cunts as they bash the North (typical Southerners, bashing people when they can’t respond), they’re music selection is pretty good. One song they’re championing is “Meds” by Placebo, which is bloody brilliant. However, one artist that is played nearly constantly is quite possibly the musical equivalent of Syphilis.

That artist is Lily Allen.

At which point I’d like to apologise for the use of the word “artist”. She is no more an artist than people who work in Subway are “artists” because they’re job title is “Sandwich Artist”.At the risk of starting a flame war with one of my groupies, but I will go so far as saying that she is more annoying than James Blunt. Why? Well, two reasons. First of all, for all James Blunt’s fault, he at least can sing. Albeit in a whiny high pitched way, but by god he can hold a note. Imagine a kareoke night, with 3 drunken girls blaring out “I Will Survive”, also roping in the designated driver too, who really doesn’t want to be there. Now, remove the drunken girls, leaving the shy little sober one signing alone. That performance is what you’re left with with Lily Allen. It’s like she doesn’t care.

The second point is relating to emotion. Sure, James Blunt makes you feel depressed, but I guess you’re supposed to. He sings about break ups, death, Chelsea winning the Premiership, and other really miserable events.The only thing I want to do when listening to Lily Allen rape my eardrums is throw a large metallic object at her in a fit of red misted rage. She is no more a musician than I am a pornstar. The only reason is that people who wouldn’t know a good tune if it hit them in the face declared Lily Allen popular was “That she had a big Myspace.”

Speaking of Myspace, it has done nothing but annoy me today. One of my friends has requested for me to join. However, she sent the email to my hotmail account (rhys_boy84). So, instead of a recieving a “….wants to be your friend!” email and a link to her profile, I get a “…..wants you to join Myspace!” with no link to her profile. Reluctantly, after finding no other way around it, I sign up to my third myspace account. I can see why it has over 100 million profiles, some of them a probably people like me who sign up multiple accounts. You would of thought by then I would see her friend request, and then add her. But oh no, on signing on, it sends a friend request to her from me. It’s all rather frustrating, as I’ve hit my 100th friend (which is doubly impressive, as I generally don’t add random bands), and I can’t seem to get 101. Woe is me.

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