October 21st, 2006
Categories: Uncategorized

We Want A Refund!


This week hasn’t been too good a week. I’ve visited the doctors, the dentist and the vet all in a space of a week. All are pretty minor stuff, but the vet is what I want to talk about.

We spayed bonnie.

I did mention it in what my many millions and millions of fans have called the worst post ever (Sibley: I assumed they wanted mundane, so I gave them mundane. HB: I spelt “thought” correctly in the proper post, just didn’t change it here), but I’ll go into gory detail here. She had her womb ripped out, stitched up, and she became drowsy with a lampshade on her head.


“Awww”, everybody said, “She’s tired!”. We wish she was still drowsy.

You see, Bonnie loves light and reflection, she is fascinated by it. If the light catches my belt buckle, or she knocks my optical mouse over exposing the innards, she stares at the wall for days. As I speak, it’s a fairly bright day, and the light has more than one occassion caught her collar, which generates a relection. As such, bonnie has spent her day doing circles, it’s highly amusing, and I wish I had a video on my phone to show you, alas I don’t. But she’s not exactly been easy to control the last few days, and I have been trying to avoid touching her wound.

At least it’s stopped the main problem of her humping pillows, right? Wrong. At 7pm last night, she was once again straddling the pillow, rubbing her bits on it like a big fluffy doggy dildo. “Awww!” dad said, “she’s weed on the pillow again, I thought we were meant to stop this!”

Yes dad….’wee’.

Mum wasn’t at first best pleased, screaming “I want it put back!” and “I want a refund!”, but then she thought of the problems that bonnie’s mother had with phantom pregnancies, and became philosophical – comparing bonnie’s situation to a friends who had a hysterectomy.

“As my friend told me: When you have an hysterectomy, you take away the nursery, but leave the play ground”

I love my mum when she spurts gems like that…

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