April 4th, 2007
Categories: Uncategorized

On Nipples, Nakedness and Mario Strikers


Long time readers of my blog know that during my singledom days at Liverpool University I had a thing for Lucy Pinder – a UK glamour model that rather famously never showed herself fully in the buff. She was quite popular with my good self, as she appeared to be both stunningly beautiful (What? I do have a thing for brunettes with big boobs, mentioning no names), so – when I found a link to a gallery of her topless on Gorillamask.net, I thought – out of curiosity – I’d check it out.

Should Lucy be reading this, don’t take this the wrong way, but I was disappointed. I dunno why it was but they were just…..boobs. Nice boobs, but I kinda felt that I’ve seen them all before. At first I was worried that I was actually turning gay, but then I thought “No! Lots of men don’t ‘read’ these magazines, and they turned out okay.”, Guy for example used to send me texts saying “have you bought this week’s Zoo? It’s fucking terrible!”. I had to agree. There was usually two good articles per magazine (one of which was the TV listings), the rest was filled with “Impose Englishness on foreign soil”, “Buy this hair gel and women will sleep with you” (if you can see my Russel Brand esque buffon I’m currently sporting, you know full well I don’t wear hair gel), and the simple arse-kissyness of Sony.

I stopped buying Lads Mags about 6 months ago, largely because I felt their “writing” was purile, and as deep as a pygmy’s paddling pool. Plus they nick all their gags from b3ta. I switched to magazines such as Edge, PC (and the occasional) Linux Format, Top Gear and – god help me – I read a couple of articles in my brother’s Economist, largely because they stimulate what I think is the most important muscle in the body. The brain.

Well, it’s either that, or I’m turning gay*.

msc.jpgOne thing that did get me genuinely excited was this article, which is for Mario Striker’s Charged. Not only it is the first football game for the Wii, but it is also the first online game for the Wii (which sounds more impressive than the Pokemon claptrap they promised). It all sounds rather impressive: the game will automatically match players depending on skill level and region, and there will be leagues with “achievement prizes” (which will probably be just simple graphics). Alas, this game has got me excited. It won’t be as deep, thorough or as tru-e to the game as Pro Evo, but I have a feeling it could be a hell of a lot of fun.

Finally, I’ve been trying to finish on a certain note, about future plans for this blog, but I’m trying to think of a way to say it without making you run a mile. So here it is: tomorrow, Han will be naked on her blog. I will be naked on here. I wouldn’t normally do it (and Han CERTAINLY wouldn’t), but there’s a very important message we need to share. Hence the nakedness. Find out tomorrow (or you can scour Jem’s blog, who alerted me to the idea).

* I’m not, the thought of waking up next to a hairy bloke makes me shiver, as well as other things that gay men do

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