One of my favourite things about “The Beautiful Game” of football is that the fans are some of the most creative people in the world. From a finite number of songs, they can change the lyrics to sing about their heroes/enemies in creative and funny ways that’d make Wierd Al Yankovic’s lyrics seem insipid and boring. With that said, here are three of my favourite football chants ever. These three made me chuckle profusely, and – whilst I’d love to know all the words to “Sol, Sol, Wherever You May Be” – I can’t include it because I don’t. Like all good football chants, they’re easy to learn.
I’m not including cruel chants such as the afformented “Sol, Sol” or “There’s Only Two Andy Gorams”. So, here goes.
1. “He Shoots, He scores, he’ll eat your labradors”
Probably my favourite chant of all time, and it takes lighthearted mick of a common stereotype. The chant is aimed at Park Ji-Sung, Manchester United’s South Korean attacking midfielder, who rather ironically is a weak finisher. Nevertheless, it’s sung in jest by the home crowd.
2. “The Referee’s a camel”
I had to get a Colwyn Bay chant in there, didn’t I? This chant was sung at the Colwyn Bay vs. Cammell Laird Semi Final Playoffs. We were getting a few decisions against us.
3. “We can sing better than your wife”
Even Americans, who have little to no knowledge of football, come up with some doozeys. This was sung during David Beckham’s debut for LA Galaxy.
What are some of your favourites? Share them in the comments. You can see a weekly update with some great chants on the BBC Fun and Games page.
Comments: 8 Comments
Rhys Wynne, the author of this blog, is a 20 something web designer from Colwyn Bay. 
“You only sing when you’re fishing” Wxm fans at Grimbsby
“Does your boyfriend know you’re here?” Cardidd fans at Brighton
Villa Fans i have found sing the funniest songs – one of my favourites was watching them away at Wycombe Wanderers in the Carling Cup a few years ago.
Chanting at the Wyombe keeper
“SHIT HAR! The goalies got shit hair, the goalies got shit hair!”
this went on for some time and was hilarious on 2 fronts –
1. the goalies buffon was dire…
2. a bunch of brummies 90% skin heads singing it!
The best chants are the spontaneous ones – the unplanned ones that come about because of something that has happened at the match. There have been various ones at Stoke over the years, but one of the funniest things wasn’t a chant but what they did. It came over the PA system that a man’s wife had gone into labour and that he needed to go and see her. Cue rapturous applause and cheering from the Stoke fans
A few seasons ago I was watching Everton at Old Trafford (Man Utd home ground for all none footy fans) at a time when we were near the bottom of the league and in danger of being relegated.
Man Utd were 2-0 up and their fans started singing “Going down, going down, going down” in the direction of the Everton fans – to which we responded with “So are we, so are we, so are we’! Brilliant!
I have to admin the first one made me lol.
You forgot the sheep one! I know there’s one about sheep somewhere cos I remember you talking about it!
The Wrexham chant for their new hero Eifion Williams.
There is only one ‘F’ in Eifon, one ‘F’ in Eifon.
I’m sure the best ones are far too offensive to be published on the BBC!