Drinking alcohol is neither big nor clever, but lets face it, it’s the only way some of us actually can speak to women. Bloggrrl probably has no problems speaking to women, and when she announced her September Shots Competition, I thought about entering.
There’s a good reason for me to enter this one, I don’t like entering blog competitions, as usually I have to do things like include three deep links using big words, sacrifice a goat, and complete the Krypton Factor assault course in under 10 minutes. Even the more easy to enter contests ask for links that don’t really fit into my blog. Until this competition, which asks the following question:
“What is the stipidest thing you’ve done drunk?”
I’ve posted about mine a while back, but it’s worth another post.
The year was 2004, Monotesticular Lance Armstrong won his 6th Tour de France, Greece are the surprise winners of European Championships and Manchester United are the not so surprise winners of the FA Cup. Another amazing sporting achievements was me, as my year as a regular member of the Ten Pin Bowling team meant that I was a fully paid up member of the Atheletic Union, and was invited to nights out and all sorts of evenings with girly footballing men and manly lacrosse playing women.
The highlight of the year was an evening dinner and a ball in one of Liverpool’s top function halls. This year, it was the turn of The Gladstone hotel near Lime Street, Liverpool’s main station.
The problems began when - being one of the most popular clubs in the Atheltic Union, we straddled two tables of 8 of us. The price of the three course meal was £25, which included four bottles of wine per table, two red and two white.
The problems began when on our table I was the only person who could stomach white wine, not that I was complaining at the time. So taking the two bottles of Chardonnay underneath my arm, I proceeded to drink, on an empty stomach. I was a student, it was illegal to refuse free booze.
So yeah, drinking on an empty stomach meant I didn’t really remember too much of my meal. In fact, the rest of the evening was a blur, but according to all sources, I disappeared at around 11:30pm.
The next thing I remember was 6am, waking up on a cool April morning, being rudely awaken by a train. Gathering my barings and letting my hangover kick in, I realised where I was.
Chester Station. 40 miles away, or - for those who live in Metric - here’s a map.
Was quite a trek. What did I do? Did I survive the ghetto slums that is Chester? Well surprisingly all things considered I had my wallet and phone, and was still in a suit, so a bacon butty and a pepsi (best hangover cure ever), and I was right as rain.
I mentioned the story to the people I was spending the evening with, and asked me what happened. Apparently the story goes that I was speaking to a mate after meeting his parents for the first time that day. Between our drunken selves we said that we would head back to Colwyn Bay to meet my mum as a surprise visit the next day. I got up and said “I know! Lets do this now!”. My mate backed off, I bought a ticket back to Colwyn Bay, but only got as far as Chester.
I did continue my journey and meet my mum.
What’s been the most drunk you’ve ever been?
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Rhys Wynne, the author of this blog, is a 20 something web designer from Colwyn Bay.
A quality tale indeed! I loved the part about the ghetto slums that are Chester and you’re spot on about refusing free booze being illegal as a student - it still is once you graduate, isn’t it?!?
I do have one point of disagreement however - drinking alcohol is big and is clever and furthermore will always remain so - after all, how else does the average person get through the week … or is that just me?? Er…
I’m so ashamed when I read the question “what’s the most drunk you have ever been?” so many stories flashed before my eyes… none of which I wish to share at the moent… oh the shame
I remember Krypton Factor!
I’m with Ryan on this. Too many drunken tales not fit for children’ ears.
Now I want a bacon buttie.
Rang Daisy and invited her over.
stupidist things probably monday and wednesday but SO fun! and randomest thing was saturday! Waking up on someones sofa who I’ve never really spoken too!
i’m generally a pretty good drunk! I just get violent!
Only once have I been so drunk I’ve had blackouts *before* midnight. It was the final night before the Student Union closed for Christmas. A lot was drunk and I got politely asked to leave and upon leaving shouted at the bouncer that “you can’t chuck me out, chuck him out he’s underage!”, pointing at my slightly worried underage housemate.
As punishment I had to endure the pain of a 6 hour train ride home the next day.
Haha nice drunk story!
The worst I ever got was about 5 years ago when I went out just before leaving for uni, we went on a vodka binge trying out all the flavoured shots this bar had ranging from white chocolate, to chilli and even to kipper.. about 30 shots later I was carried from the club by the bouncer after getting so wasted I couldn’t walk, I was then sat down outside and decided I was reallllly hot and wanted to go for a swim, right next to the club was the Bristol docks and I got up and ran full pelt in my high heels to the railings and was halfway over when my friend grabbed me and pinned me up against the wall to stop me. I would probably have drowned as I think I was wasted enough to forget all swimming capabilities by that point lol