Bah humbug.
No not really, I do love Christmas, and 2007′s Christmas was a quality one. However, there are things that this Christmas, along with every Christmas, I don’t like. Here they are.
1. Christmas Dinner
Specifically – Turkey. Is there a more bland meat than this? It’s horrible cardboard material from a untasty and expensive bird. It’s vile, and I can’t stand it. I stomach it because it’s Christmas, but I only eat it once a year (which is once more than sprouts). When I’m older, just give me stuffing and sausages wrapped in bacon. Sod the turkey. If you want one, get something from Bernard Matthews, it tastes the same.
2. The Fact X-Factor Get #1
Recently (last few years or so), the excitement of the UK Christmas Single’s chart has been completely crushed thanks to the X-Factor. Basically, whoever wins that show gets a guarenteed Christmas #1. Often there’s one serious contender, and a bunch of jokey records, but it’s usually The X-Factor. This year the winner, Leon, was drab, bland and so unchristmassy it was painful. I just think that when Christmasses are spent working in Simon Cowell’s gold mines with the only chance of “entertainment” being spoon fed garbage music, just remember, I fucking called it.
3. The wierd sleeping patterns associated with the day
Okay, this is my own fault. I generally go to the pub for the only two hours they are open: 12pm-2pm. As the pub is only opened for two hours, I generally spend my time there getting a little lubricated. Couple that with the wine, port and more beer I drink voer the day, I usually end up not drunk, but exhausted by about 7pm. It’s wierd, considering that when you’re little, you go to bed so early on Christmas Eve. Now, I end up shattered by about 8pm I’m usually knackered. Then I wake up at 6am Boxing day, and my sleeping pattern becomes the same as somebody who has flown to the UK from New York. In other words, screwed.
This makes it sound like I hate Christmas. I don’t, I love it! But I can’t be the only person to think some elements of the perfect day are stupidly imperfect. What don’t you like about Crimbo?
Comments: 6 Comments
Rhys Wynne, the author of this blog, is a 20 something web designer from Colwyn Bay. 
I totally agree about the Turkey thing, I don’t even know why we have turkey anyway as Goose was the traditional British Christmas meat until some sod figured out it was easier to mass rear turkey so it took over.
The whole X-factor as Christmas number 1 thing annoys the shit out of me, I miss the days where the shit novelty records would get to number 1 and be a whole lot more memorable than say..the last two..infact I know Leona Lewis was number 1 last year but what did she sing? Yep it was that memorable.
The best thing about Christmas is the turkey sandwiches.
I don’t like turkey much either. My mum bought turkey (for the traditionalists), duck and lamb this year though so I had a nice selection to choose from.. and I ate 2 brussel sprouts. Go me! I think sausages wrapped in bacon are total crap though – you need to try glacé cherries wrapped in bacon instead. Ooh, so delicious :9
What do I not like about Christmas? The fact that I’m old now, so I get less pressies. Materialism ftw.
Turkey is only bland because you are eating the Bernard Mathews’ variety. We used to buy our bird in about April and fatten him up for December. He would make the ultimate sacrifice around the 15th of the month and be hung for a week afterwards. Trust me, free range turkeys have a great taste.
Hey you’re right ! Turkey for Christmas dinner is painful. Leon at XFactor what a shame.
Turkey has been the tradition since the 1700′s. Black turkeys are jam packed full of flavour, very tasty birds. Apparently, the white ones are seen to be prettier (before they get the chop that is…) and easier to quickly fatten up. Solution, switch to black turkeys. We made the switch this year… incredible difference