Earlier on this week, I regaled you with a sympathetic tale of my weekend that – whilst good, had the unfortunate side effect that every six seconds I was polaxing myself and coughing up inhuman amount of catarrh over large areas that it was making me miserable. Lucky I didn’t have any tickets for the snooker grand final as I would’ve been thrown out.
You’ll be no doubt pleased to hear that I have since managed to kick Vinny Virus almost into touch, with the occasional sniffle and a horribly unhealthy sounding wheeze being the only remnants remaining on my personage. However, with every catarrh ass kicked silver lining is a huge problematic cloud, one of which I’m not proud of.
I’ve become addicted to cough syrup.
I’m not usually one for a sweet tooth, but I was downing shots of the honey, glucose and lemon based elixir with as much love as a marathon runner shows when they drink during a race. Each two hour spread between fixes resulted in me becoming twitchy, paranoid and tense. I paced around my office in work like a caged animal, and grasped the mouse hard to try in a vain attempt to calm me down.
It just tastes so nice.
It’s not all bad, it has also caused me to be more linguistically creative and write using big words. Plus it gives me a great business idea – come up with a drink similar to this that you don’t need any health warnings printed on.
What tastes are you addicted too?
Another driving lesson tomorrow – hopefully I will learn to take corners as well as Michael Schumacher, and not as well as Wayne Rooney.
Comments: 10 Comments
Rhys Wynne, the author of this blog, is a 20 something web designer from Colwyn Bay. 
I was addicted to that Sudafed Nasal spray once for about a year. Everytime I stopped taking it I would get all blocked up and unable to sleep so I would begin the cycle again. It was a bad bad time for me.wondering the streets in my underwear looking to score more from Boots…
I hope you won’t be reduced to wondering the streets in your underwear looking for more Veno’s.
Good luck tomorrow!
Thank fully I am not addicted to any taste. I like the sedentary effect that the cough syrups have on ones body. It gives me such a nice sleep after having some cough syrups.
I forgot to add, all the best for your driving lesson. Once you know how to drive, you’ll love it.
Tip for Driving – Try to visualise where your wheels (well, for now, the front two) are on the road, and where they are pointing.
Also, smoothness is the key, and slow right down. Ease the car in and out of a corner without any sharp fast movements of the steering wheel.
I spent all day today towing (and often reversing) a trailer. Accelerating is like having Rosie O’Donnell hanging from your back on her arse – and Braking is like having a bus pushing up your arse.
Then there’s the swaying…
Personally, I have to watch it with NyQuil. I don’t know if you guys have it over there but it has a lot of alcohol in it. The taste isn’t all that great, but you get knocked the hell out and sleep great. I have the weirdest dreams and wake up REALLLLLLLLLY groggy.
As far as tastes that I’ve been addicted to, the Cheesecake Factory had a key lime cheesecake that even now just thinking about it starts a party in my mouth. *drool*
Bush: NyQuil can honestly cause you to hallucinate. Just take my word for it…and don’t ask how I know!
my boss’s wife made me a Baileys cheescake once, I ate the whole thing so she made me another and I ate all that too. There’s something about eating a cake that carries your name that I couldn’t resist.
funnily, some crack I bought in Camden off an honest looking Rasta had no effect (although it could have been a crusty bogey, I’m not sure, never smoked bogey before so I couldn’t compare)
Calpol. yummy yummy.
ooh and bonjela gum gel stuff – (the original not the mint one) thats gorgeous.
good luck driving, u’ve almost convinced me to try again.
Any time I have a slight sniffle I bring out the Nyquil and it’s little cup. I swear the stuff helps me not only focus better, but clean house like a maniac. But I have to say- I am LOL’ing at the “tickly coughs” description. You wacky Brits- that’s why I love ya.
I’ve been lucky enough this Canadian winter not to have a cold as yet…when I do, I always go for the NeoCitran. Knocks me right out!
Also, for anyone that has a stuffy nose, those weird looking nose strips really open your nasal passages. Also good in preventing snoring. Not that I, um, snore, or anything…not me……